Wednesday, June 05, 2013

no time for cornbread


Or time for anything much at all really.
Owen is ten weeks old and while things have certainly gotten easier, 
I'm still learning how to manage my time well.
You see, I've been calling Owen 'king of the cat nap' 
because its rare for him to take a nap more than 20 minutes. 
This makes things a little tricky.
Dinners need to be made.
Dishes need to be done.
Diapers need to be washed.

And those aren't even the essentials, 
I need to eat (nursing really depletes your caloric intake!)
I really should shower.
And this momma needs to sleep since 
(though he's getting better) 
Owen also wakes up 3-4 times a night. 

Now before you think I'm complaining, know this, I wouldn't trade this job for the world! I'd take the sleep deprivation, the messy house, the dirty diapers, the days without showers, the ever growing piles of laundry, the growling belly because I haven't had time to eat over anything you could offer me. 
Why?
Because this is my lot.
This is the tiny human God has given me to lay my life down for. And it is only by God's grace I am even able to do so!

I like to put tasty meals on the table for Jonny.
If there's one thing I despise it's a kitchen counter cluttered with stacks of dirty dishes.
And I don't know anyone who can say that it makes their day wiping the poo off a baby bum, no matter how adorable said baby bum is!
A rumbling tummy never feels good.
Without a shower, I just feel gross. 
And let's face it, I don't look too good or smell too pretty either. 

Then there's some really shallow things my flesh desires, like...
Wanting to get a tan because its summer.
Wanting to workout because, well, I just had a baby and we're going to the beach next month.
New clothes that cover up this post-preggo body a little better.
Just being honest here!

But God has given me much grace! 
I don't know exactly when, but several years ago God saved me. 
What does it mean to be saved? 
By saying 'saved' it must mean I was headed in a dangerous direction.
 I lived to glorify myself, to fulfill my desires. 
I did so and saw no problem with it. 
BUT God, intervened! 
He showed me the sinfulness of my selfish pursuits and gave me truly amazing grace! 
This grace has given me the power to live for the glory of Him who saved me!

So are you wondering what the connection is between my
'no time for dirty dishes, dinner, laundry and showering' rant is? 
I am freed from living for myself because Christ died!

And as for those really shallow desires of my flesh,
I have been given the word of God to fight the temptation to long for the things of this world,
and to fix my eyes on Jesus!

I know, you thought this post was about cornbread and now you're like "Umm, what?"
I've just being sitting here in a rocking chair 
feeding and rocking this precious baby boy since 5:13, it is now 7:25 
(my backside is starting to go numb). 
I sat down thinking about the cornbread that would really be nice to go with our dinner 
and the dishes that need to go in the dishwasher
 but God has given me much grace
and I am able to reframe my thinking.
When Owen takes over an hour to feed, then refuses to nap in his crib
 I have the means to count it all joy! 
I have this opportunity to lay down my life!
This is my lot and I am thankful.


1 comment:

Kate Murray said...

This is beautiful!

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